Charles Mingus, on how to make his famous, deadly, holiday eggnog
- * Separate one egg for one person. Each person gets an egg.
- * Two sugars for each egg, each person.
- * One shot of rum, one shot of brandy per person.
- * Put all the yolks into one big pan, with some milk.
- * That’s where the 151 proof rum goes. Put it in gradually or it’ll burn the eggs,
- * OK. The whites are separate and the cream is separate.
- * In another pot– depending on how many people– put in one shot of each, rum and brandy. (This is after you whip your whites and your cream.)
- * Pour it over the top of the milk and yolks.
- * One teaspoon of sugar. Brandy and rum.
- * Actually you mix it all together.
- * Yes, a lot of nutmeg. Fresh nutmeg. And stir it up.
- * You don’t need ice cream unless you’ve got people coming and you need to keep it cold. Vanilla ice cream. You can use eggnog. I use vanilla ice cream.
- * Right, taste for flavor. Bourbon? I use Jamaica Rum in there. Jamaican Rums. Or I’ll put rye in it. Scotch. It depends. See, it depends on how drunk I get while I’m tasting it.
Smarm hopes to fill the cultural or political or religious void left by the collapse of authority, undermined by modernity and postmodernity. It’s not enough anymore to point to God or the Western tradition or the civilized consensus for a definitive value judgment. Yet a person can still gesture in the direction of things that resemble those values, vaguely. — Tom Scocca, from “On Smarm”